Love Go Round

He loves me, he loves me not….

He loves me, he loves me not….

Why are we taught this rhyme when we were little girls innocently plucking off the white daisy petals.

Hoping. Hoping that this time it will turn out that he does love me and now everything would be alright.

What in the heck is wrong with this picture.

I am now reinventing this song. Learn it. Teach it.

I love me, I love me…..

I love me, I love me….

 “If you don’t love yourself, you cannot love others. You will not be able to love others. If you have no compassion for yourself then you are not able of developing compassion for others.”  Dalai Lama

It has taken me forty years to finally realize that having love in my life begins from within.  Once you love yourself, your heart is an open vessel ready to receive love into your life.

Is your heart open?

We are all taught to feel that love from others is what validates us.

It is not. This is what allows you to let others make you feel unworthy.

This gives  away your power.

If your spouse cheats on you and wants a divorce, does this mean you are flawed? Not deserving of love?

Absolutely not.

This is what I struggled with after my husband left and I was alone. Alone with my kids and an illness.

I was forced to rediscover myself and who I really was.

 When you are in a place of acceptance of who you truly are, you are never really alone.

Why do people stay in an abusive relationship? Fear of being alone?  That no one else will love them?

An illness can also shake the very foundation of who you thought you were.

As your physical body may become less than perfect, your confidence shatters and you are left spiralling in a self image whirlwind.

You may no longer recognize the reflection you see in the mirror each morning.

But it is still you.

Your spirit’s beauty has not dimmed.  Let it shine.

Ask yourself this.

If everyone in your life fell away, would you be able to stand alone in love?

When you are able to do this, imagine how bright you will shine when you are surrounded by the ones you love?

You don’t need my permission, but here it is.

It is okay to love yourself.

Pick up a daisy and start now,

I love me, I love me….

There is no loser in this game.

Cindy Lee Lothian

January 14, 2013