Sex x Three?

Is there a third partner in your bed?

He might be hoping it is the playboy playmate of the year.

You might be hoping it is Fabio.

But wait, no!

It is a white elephant.?

It is not a sexy third playmate, but rather the unspoken insecurities that one or both of you may be feeling.

It is time we blew the doors open on the discussion of ms and sexuality.

After speaking to hundreds of people who are living with ms, no one wants to talk about what this means when it comes to their sexual intimacy.

Sure you might say that it is the last thing on their mind when they have bigger things to worry about.

This is not true.

Intimacy with your partner can lift your spirits better than any prescription meted out by your doctor.

The touch of a lover’s hand, to be held  in another’s arms are all things that bring love and a deep sense of harmony.

There are many issues that can be standing  in the way of you achieving sexual fulfillment in your relationships.

Having an illness can lead to a decline in your self image.

You may no longer like your naked body you see in the reflection in the mirror.

Be kind to yourself and understand that your partner loves you just the way you are. You have not changed in their eyes, only your own critical ones.

Anxiety over performance can also lead to an intimate night full of distraction and disappointment.

Do not get caught up in the end result.

Enjoy each kiss, each caress.

There is no script. The act is entirely up to you.

It is not all about always needing to score a perfect ten.

Your ego is the only one keeping tally.

It is about the journey.

The expression of your love by the giving and receiving pleasure.

When you can be open with your partner about your own insecurities, this  allows you to be vulnerable.

When you give your true self, a deeper intimacy than you thought possible will leave you spellbound.

“Laughter and orgasm are great bedfellows.”

Learn to laugh, to make intimacy playful.

If you find that fatigue often keeps you from wanting to do anything but sleep, find a time of day that you feel your best and make a date with your partner.

A massage with some coconut oil is a great way to relax and reconnect with your spouse.

Pour a bubble bath for two and light some candles.

Remember, there are no expectations.

The joy is is in the unknown.

Take off your mask and let your lover see the naked you.

Cindy Lee Lothian

January 18, 2013