Sleeping Beauty?

Like Sleeping Beauty, I sleep the sleep of the dead waiting for not the kiss from my Prince Charming but  for what? 

As I lay in a half state of consciousness, drifting in and out of the dream world I can hear my son laughing downstairs with his teenage friends who are about to turn into men as they graduate from high school in two weeks.  They are about to emerge from their cocoon of childhood comfort and protection to be set free into the world to blossom into all they can be. 

I drift back into sleep, dreaming of my mother again who visits me from the angel realms.  Sometimes I want to stay in this place of comfortable bliss, with no worries and in the midst of my mother’s love. 

The cawing of the raven which sits atop my rooftop brings me back to this world of reality but the bed feels too good to get up.  I am still so tired. 

Forget how much wood could a woodchuck chuck the real question is how many hours can I sleep? This worries me as I lay in bed knowing I should be up and doing something  productive. After all, isn’t the saying “I will sleep when I am dead?”

I often wonder when I am having  one of these tired days, am I really that tired or am I trying to escape from my frustrations and limitations from MS?

Is the sleep realm where I can drift and sometimes talk with my mother a more attractive place than the one I am living in this life? 

I am still not sure what the answer is to this question but I know that unlike sleeping beauty, I need a magic pill of energy.  Or maybe a kiss and a hug from a loved one would work the same as a magic pill? 

Nevertheless, I have now arisen from what seems like a two day slumber, like a phenix from the ashes. I feel recharged again and not only ready to face, but to embrace, my life with all of it’s ups and downs.  

So sleep, my sleeping beauties and know that you will once again awake feeling reborn with or without your prince charming. 

Cindy Lee Lothian

June 7, 2013